From GamingReport.Com
Five years ago, Little Fears debuted at Origins 2001 to critical acclaim and commercial success. Then, in 2003, it disappeared like a shadow into the light, like a child into the night.
In 2007, darkness will descend again. The closet door will open. Tell me, child, are you still afraid?
Jason Blair is a friend of mine, and I know that he’s been wanting to do this project for quite some time. So, good for him!
People ask me how things are going on the new house, and I”m never really sure how to answer them. Sure, over the last week, I”ve helped hang drywall, paint walls and trim, and lay flooring. But when I tour the house, I don”t see any rooms that I could point at and say, “Look! It’s done!” So I struggle a lot with depression. I see all the hustle and bustle of work being done, but is anything really being accomplished? Particularly after a night of painting trim for hours, I feel like I’m spending lots of time but not actually getting anywhere.
My brother has been helping out on Saturdays, and he has a different perspective. Last Saturday, he commented to me that there was a lot that had been done during the week. Since he wasn’t in the middle of the work, he had a better perspective to see what was actually being done.
Also, somewhere in my mind, I know that, very soon, we will do the finishing touches on a number of rooms and suddenly everything will be done. All this apparently futile work will suddenly resolve into a completed house. When it happens, I’ll be totally blind-sided, because I know that I don’t really believe that the work will ever be done.
Your life is like a house being built, and Jesus is the Builder. So often there are times when it feels like there’s all this hustle and bustle in your life, but nothing is happening. You’re still struggling with the same sufferings, failing in the same disciplines, falling for the same sins. And it feels like it will never change.
The Apostle Paul understood this struggle. In one of his letters, he writes of his own wearying struggle against sin:
I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin. (Romans 7:15-25)
However, in another of his letters, he writes this, “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” (Philippians 1:6) Despite all evidence to the contrary, Jesus has not abandoned you. If He started the project, He will finish it.
On one level, the project will not be done until your death, when you are perfected. But even during this life, Jesus hits milestones along the way. One day, you will suddenly realize that you’re not struggling with that suffering anymore, or that you have established that discipline, or that you have overcome that sin. And you’ll be blind-sided, because you didn’t really believe that Jesus was really doing anything at all.
Right now, my family doesn’t really fit well into the house where we are living. The children are all packed into two connected rooms. Arianna needs to go through the boys’ room to get to the space that she shares with Justice. Gabrielle doesn’t even have a room of her own; we’ve hung a curtain in the sunroom, dividing it in two, and called it her room.
Most of our stuff is in storage. Yesterday I wanted to get my hands on a couple of books, but I didn’t even know where to start looking. We are constantly looking for things that we own but are packed away…somewhere.
Noah has suddenly decided to enter “the Terrible Twos”, which means that he wants his own way, and he wants to touch and destroy everything around him. Although we have tried, we cannot keep him out of Arianna’s room. So he has trashed different things belonging to her, and there doesn’t seem to be anything that we can do to stop him.
Soon, we will be moving. Soon we will be in a house that will better fit our family. Arianna will have a room which can be secured, so that Noah can’t get to her things. Gabrielle will actually have four walls. We will be able to put all the books on bookshelves and not have to wonder if that thing we’re looking for is locked in storage somewhere. It will be so much better than where we are now. But for now, we are in transition.
This world is like a house where we live. But we don’t really fit here. So we struggle with the problems in this world. Things don’t work right. Petty annoyances grate on our nerves. And then there are the big issues. People hate each other. Those we love, die. Those who hate us, prosper.
And then there are our bodies, gradually wearing out, day after day. We can’t walk or think or laugh quite as well as we used to. The light of life grows dim and, one day, will go out.
But Jesus spoke of going away to prepare a place for those whom He loves. “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.” (John 14:1-3) Right now, He is working on the new house, and there will be enough space for all of us. The dining room will fit the entire family, with room for guests. Everyone will have a room with four walls. Nothing will ever break again, be it a doorknob or a computer or a friendship. Everything will work right, the way that it should. And we will be together forever.
But we’re not there yet. So we are called to live with perseverance. For now, we need to be content where Jesus has placed us. But remember, we won’t be in this house forever. Soon we will be moving out into that perfect brand-new house.
Soon.
I’m beginning the third straight week of working on the new house. In the evenings I come home from work and hustle down to the new house to put in a few hours, trying to get the house ready for us to buy and occupy. This has been a frustrating experience for me. I’m not very good at working with my hands, and I find that I miss my wife and children as I have been away so much. At the same time, this time has been eye-opening to me. In particular, I’m beginning to see all the illustrations of God’s truth that are sitting right in front of me. So, to try to make the best use of this experience, I will be writing about these thoughts, using this current experience of house-building as the springboard for these thoughts. I have a few articles lined up already, and, if I think of more, I’ll write them down too.
Not on the house, silly people. On my blog! After being at this site for seven months, I finally got the title up on the banner. Yay me!
For those of you who like Ra, you should really check out this thread. Someone has put together a computer version of Ra with AI players. And, best of all, it’s free!
Since someone asked, I’ll briefly pick apart the format for a collect, using my last one as an example:
O God my Father
Who raised my Lord Jesus Christ from the grave
Raise me from my bed and fill me with your power
That I might be able to serve and love you this day
Hear this groggy morning prayer and answer in Your mercy
Amen
First, there is an address to God by one of His names or titles. This should be connected with the theme of the collect. (O God my Father)
Second, there is a description of an action or attribute of God’s that will be the focus of the collect. (Who raised my Lord Jesus Christ from the grave)
Third, the petition is made, which should be related to the title and attribute of God discussed in the first two parts. (Raise me from my bed and fill me with your power)
Fourth, the results of granting the petition, or failing to do so, are stated. (That I might be able to serve and love you this day)
Fifth, there is a closing appropriate to the overall theme of the collect. (Hear this groggy morning prayer and answer in Your mercy. Amen.)
Thus, the five parts of a collect.
So, I’ve been reading a lot of spy novels and detective novels recently. I’ve been playing Spione, when time has permitted. I’m working on Dirty Secrets, a detective storygame.
And now I have discovered my soundtrack.
Jon pointed me in the direction of Portishead after I exposed him to a group called Bliss.
To Kill a Dead Man
Sour Times
Glory Box
I’m not usually a fan of music videos, and, honestly, from one perspective these aren’t really that great. But they have atmosphere!
Plus, “To Kill a Dead Man” was actually a short film that Portishead put together so that they could score it.
(Didn’t believe me, James, did you?)
As a result of watching the developing Spione project, I’ve become interested in the Cold War. It’s an area of history that we tend to ignore, even though it shapes many of our assumptions about the current day, including the current War on Terror.
So, that all being said, when perusing the Spione site today, I found this link which shows various pictures of the Berlin Wall during the 1980s. Here are some that stood out to me:
Checkpoint Charlie
the “dead zone”
another view of the “dead zone”
a watchtower
a view through the trees
walking beside the Wall
With some help from my co-worker Stephen Bock, I have fixed the comment text. Now you should actually be able to read what you’re typing. Thanks, Bock!
O God my Father
Who raised my Lord Jesus Christ from the grave
Raise me from my bed and fill me with your power
That I might be able to serve and love you this day
Hear this groggy morning prayer and answer in Your mercy
Amen
(Yes, I’m being serious.)
Here’s a goal for myself and my family. I would like us to be able to be able appreciate high culture intelligently without losing the ability to celebrate low culture raucously.
Yeah. That seems about right.
Given that an email went out with the URL of this blog, I thought that I’d take a moment to welcome all Providence members to my blog.
Hi!
Please leave a comment so that I can get you past my “approve the new people” moderation.
I’ve spent most of my evenings during this past week, working on the new house. I spent ten hours on Saturday, working on the new house. I’m looking forward to a new week…of working on the new house.
They tell me that there’s a certain satisfaction to working with your hands. They tell me that there’s a certain satisfaction to working on your own house. They tell me that it’s a special feeling.
They’re wrong.
I take no satisfaction in this work, nor, quite honestly, am I anticipating feeling satisfied. I would be just as happy if someone else were doing it. At the end of each night, I feel empty. Even cutting and hanging drywall yesterday all by myself gave only the mildest thrill. You know, something along the lines of “Thank God I didn’t screw that up too badly”.
I used to tell myself that I’d feel different when the work is done, that I’d walk by the walls that I helped hang and think, “I did that.” But no longer. I rather doubt that I will think anything of the kind. It’s all assembly-work, just putting Tab A into Slot B. I don’t get satisfaction from assembly-work in other areas of my life, and I refuse to lie to myself about it now.
Instead, when I come home, I look at the bedroom which my children share. Sure, there’s a connecting doorway, but I can’t close it off. So, functionally, my daughter is sharing a room with her brothers. Justice sleeps in his playpen next to her anyways. I look at the latest mess that Noah has left in Arianna’s room, because we can’t keep him out. I try to be helpful in the kitchen but end up camped out at the dining room table, trying to do food prep.
If we were staying longer, we could probably make arrangements to care for some of these things. But we can’t.
And so, tomorrow, I’ll skip dinner again to walk down the block to work on the new house. I’ll shore up my spirits, trying to ignore the nagging voices that tell me that it will never be done. And I’ll do what has to be done.
Because my family needs it.
